Discover how growing up as a parentified eldest daughter can lead to feelings of overwhelm, resentment, or guilt in motherhood—and what you can do to break free from these patterns.

"Why do I always feel like I’m behind?" If you’re a child of immigrants, this feeling might be your baseline—but it’s not a personal failure. You were asked to carry so much before you even got to define who you are.

When used outside its intended domain, AI—even one as advanced as ChatGPT—can unintentionally aggravate mental‑health challenges, blur reality, and fuel delusions.

For many eldest daughters, growing up meant becoming “the third parent” before getting to be a child. This experience, often called parentification when expanded into a chronic pattern, can shape how we move through the world: how we relate, how we work, how we love, and even how we make sense of our needs.

As a therapist who works extensively with members of the Asian diaspora, I hear this question often, “Do you think my mom or dad is a narcissist?”. In fact, it’s not uncommon for clients to come to therapy with the deeply-rooted belief that one or both of their Asian parents is/are a narcissist. So let’s unpack this question and explore how culture plays a role.

Early childhood trauma shapes many aspects of our personality development, including how we see ourselves, navigate relationships and select our partners. Many who have experienced early childhood trauma- and have related core abandonment wounds- find themselves repeatedly drawn to emotionally unavailable partners with narcissistic tendencies.

Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy is an approach to understanding and healing the mind. Developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz in the 1980s, IFS is built on the idea that the mind is made up of multiple "parts," each with its own unique perspective, emotions, and desires. 

The experience of being an adult child of immigrants (ACOI) can be profoundly complex, shaped by a blend of cultural, generational, and familial dynamics. While this identity offers unique strengths, it also presents distinct challenges that can significantly impact mental health and emotional well-being.

The role of the eldest daughter in many families, particularly in immigrant or high-stress households, is often shaped by a set of expectations that can go beyond the typical responsibilities of sibling relationships.

If you’ve spent any time on social media, you’ve probably heard about attachment styles. Attachment theory can be a helpful way to better understand your approach to dating. It can build insight into patterns in your behavior, thoughts and emotions and can clarify paths towards shifting these same patterns.

Finding a therapist is hard. Here some suggestions to get you started!