Therapy for parents & adult children in NYC
Something is off between you, and neither of you knows how to fix it alone. If you're the adult child: maybe you turn sixteen again the moment you walk through your parents' door — the old criticisms land like they always did, the boundaries you rehearsed dissolve, and visits leave you drained for days. If you're the parent: maybe your child keeps you at a careful distance you don't understand, every conversation feels like walking on eggshells, and you're grieving a closeness you thought you'd always have. Between you sit the things that were never talked about — old hurts, different memories of the same years, expectations neither of you chose — and time keeps passing.
Signs You May Benefit from Parent–Adult Child Therapy
The relationship still runs on old roles rather than who you both are now, and conversations tend to stay on safe, surface topics because deeper ones have gone poorly.
Questions Parents and Adult Children Often Ask:
"Why do I become a teenager again the second I'm around my parents?"
"Why does my child keep me at arm's length — what did I do?"
"How do I set boundaries without starting an explosion or an ice age?"
"Will they ever see me as an adult?"
"We used to be close. How did we get here?"
"How do we talk about what happened back then without it becoming a war?"
"How much time do we have left to fix this?"
How Therapy Can Help
The parent–adult child relationship is the only one that must completely renegotiate its terms — from hierarchy to something closer to equals — and most families attempt that renegotiation with no map, mid-conflict, while pretending it isn't happening. Therapy makes it explicit. Your therapist works to understand both sides fully: the adult child's experience of what childhood was like and what the relationship costs them now, and the parent's — including the context they parented in, the generation and culture that shaped them, and the love that was there even when it missed the mark. From there, the work is practical: old hurts addressed with real acknowledgment rather than "that was so long ago," boundaries negotiated as the terms of closeness rather than the end of it, and new ways of talking that don't route through guilt, silence, or a third family member. The goal is a relationship the adult version of both of you would actually choose.
The Atlas Approach
Our approach combines research-backed methods that address both the history between you and the relationship you're building now.
Each session is customized to your relationship, and may include:
Hearing both experiences fully — the childhood the adult child actually had, and the circumstances the parent actually parented in — so acknowledgment can replace debate
Renegotiating the terms: boundaries, advice, availability, holidays, involvement with partners and grandchildren — moving from parent-child hierarchy to an adult relationship you both agree to
Practicing the hard conversations in the room — raising old hurts without attack, responding without defensiveness, and repairing in real time — so the pattern changes where it lives
Our work together draws on structural and systemic family therapy approaches alongside emotionally focused work — adapted to your family's culture and generational context.
Results after therapy
Many parents and adult children complete this work within 8–15 sessions and report:
Heard Across the Generations
The old hurts, finally acknowledged — real accountability instead of "why are you bringing that up now"
Each other's contexts understood: the childhood one of you lived, the hand the other was dealt
Conversations that go beneath the weather and the logistics — safely
An Adult-to-Adult Relationship
Boundaries held without explosions, guilt campaigns, or ice ages — and understood as the terms of closeness, not rejection
Advice, involvement, and availability renegotiated to fit who you both are now
Visits that don't require a week of recovery — for either of you
Connection for the Years Ahead
A relationship that can hold what's coming: grandchildren, caregiving, aging, and everything in between
Rituals and contact you both actually want, at a rhythm you both chose
The time you have left together, spent as something better than a truce
Frequently Asked Questions
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Both, together. Either one can initiate; roughly half of these requests come from parents grieving a growing distance, and half from adult children who want a real relationship but can't survive the current one. The work requires both of you in the room — though if one of you isn't ready, you can begin individually and work toward the invitation.
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No. Understanding how the past shaped the present isn't a prosecution, and parents in this work are consistently surprised to find their side genuinely heard — the context, constraints, and intentions behind decisions their child experienced differently. What we do ask of parents is openness to hearing their child's experience without defending against it — and we ask the mirror image of adult children. Accountability and compassion move in both directions.
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This is common, especially across cultural and generational lines where family matters stay in the family. A few things help: a free consultation call is a low-commitment first step; framing it as "help for us to communicate" rather than treatment for anyone; and sometimes a reluctant parent will come once, out of love, and stay because they finally felt heard. If they won't come, individual work on your side of the relationship still changes it.
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Estrangement and near-estrangement are exactly what this work is for, and repair is possible in a large share of cases when both people are willing to show up — even after years of silence. Where full repair isn't possible, therapy can still produce a workable peace, or clarity. And when one side is motivated by "how much time do we have left," that urgency is an asset, not a pressure to hide.
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That's the entire premise of this work. The internet often presents two options — endless tolerance or no contact — but most parent–adult child relationships live in the wide middle: clear boundaries, honestly negotiated, that make continued closeness sustainable. Boundaries are how you stay in the relationship, not how you leave it.
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Yes — much of our practice is with immigrant families and adult children of immigrants, where hierarchy, respect, and duty carry deep meaning. Therapy is adapted to your family's culture: honoring elders and speaking honestly aren't opposites, and the work never requires anyone to become someone their culture wouldn't recognize.
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Very much so. In-law tension and grandparenting disagreements are two of the most common flashpoints, because they're where the renegotiation of roles gets most concrete: whose family, whose rules, whose turf. Therapy helps you sort the legitimate needs on both sides from the old pattern underneath.
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Sessions are confidential to the two of you. If your therapist meets with either of you individually, clear agreements are made up front about what returns to joint sessions — no ambushes, no secret-keeping assignments.
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Many parents and adult children complete focused work within 8–15 sessions — often organized around specific goals: acknowledge the past, negotiate the boundaries, survive the holidays differently. Deeper ruptures and estrangements may take longer.
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Either of you can take the first step. Book a free consultation call — we'll listen, help you think through how to invite the other person, and match you with the right therapist.
Meet our Therapists
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Janine Cheng, LCSW
Founder + Clinical Director
Culturally responsive therapy for perfectionists, people-pleasers, stressed couples, and strained families. Structured, and goal-oriented in a warm and supportive setting.
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Dr. Lisa Cordero, PsyD, LMHC, LPC
Psychotherapist
Active, goal-oriented therapy for individuals, couples, and families — insight into why you're stuck, and concrete tools to change it.
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Donna Hahn, LMSW
Associate Psychotherapist
Therapy for first-generation adults, perfectionists, and high achievers who are ready to put down the mask, quiet the replaying mind, and hear their own voice again.
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Jennifer Aghavian, LMSW
associate psychotherapist
Attachment-focused therapy for individuals and couples navigating anxiety, self-doubt, and relationship difficulties. Understand how past experiences, family or cultural expectations shape the way you relate to yourself and others.
Experience personalized therapy at our office in Nomad
Our office in Manhattan was intentionally designed to create a sense of comfort, privacy, and ease from the moment you walk through the door. Surrounded by refined interiors and a peaceful atmosphere, you'll find a space that encourages reflection, connection, and meaningful change.
All in-person sessions will take place in a warm, inviting space that will help you feel calm and centered for the work. The office is located in Nomad and easily accessible via the 1, 2, 3, N, R, W, B, D, F, M and 6 lines.
Connect With Us
Book a Consult
You can schedule an introductory conversation with our Clinical Director using the calendar below. During this conversation, we’ll learn more about what you’re looking for and help match you with the therapist on our team who best fits your needs.
If you prefer to connect directly with a therapist, explore our team bios and schedule a consultation with the therapist you’re most interested in working with.
E-mail Us
If you’re not quite ready to book a consultation, use the form below to introduce yourself and tell us a little about what you’re looking for.
You’ll hear from our Clinical Director within 24 business hours.
Based on what you share about your concerns, goals, preferences, availability and budget, we’ll recommend one or more therapists whose experience and approach may be a good fit and guide you through the next step.
Rewrite your story today.
You don't have to keep repeating the same patterns. Therapy can help you better understand what's driving them and create a different path forward. Let us help find the right therapist for you.