Therapy for siblings in NYC

Your sibling will likely know you longer than your parents, your partner, or your friends — and yet it may be the one important relationship you've never actually worked on. Sibling therapy is a structured place to finally have the conversation — with a therapist who understands that sibling bonds run by their own rules.

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Signs You May Benefit from Sibling Therapy

Your adult relationship keeps returning to childhood positions, or a present-day conflict has grown beyond what the two of you can resolve on your own.

  • Old Roles and Rivalries

    Interactions that fall back into the positions you each held as children, including competition and scorekeeping that no longer fit your adult lives

  • Conflict at Gatherings

    Recurring arguments or tension at holidays and family events

  • Caregiving and Financial Strain

    Disagreements over parents' care, finances, or estates that have placed new pressure on the relationship

  • Unequal Treatment

    Lingering resentment about how each of you was treated growing up, including differences in how you were parented or viewed by your parents

  • An Unaddressed Rift

    A conflict that began with a specific event and has since settled into long-term distance or silence

  • A Parent-Dependent Bond

    A relationship maintained largely through your parents, raising the question of what will hold it together without them

Questions Siblings Often Ask:

  • "Why do we fight like we're fifteen the second we're back together?"

  • "How did we grow up in the same house and remember two completely different childhoods?"

  • "Why was it so different for them — and why does no one else see it?"

  • "How do we take care of Mom and Dad without destroying what's left of us?"

  • "Can we actually be close again after years of distance?"

  • "If it weren't for our parents, would we even have a relationship?"

  • "Is it worth repairing — or should I just accept how it is?"

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How Therapy Can Help

Sibling relationships form inside a family system, and that's where therapy starts: understanding the roles each of you was assigned — the responsible one, the peacemaker, the troublemaker, the baby — and how those roles, not your actual selves, have been running the relationship ever since. Your therapist works to understand both perspectives fully, because the hardest truth in sibling work is that you can be siblings and still have had genuinely different parents: different treatment, different eras of the family, different burdens. Both stories get to be true. From there, the work turns to the present — the caregiving negotiations, the holiday flashpoints, the apology that never came — with communication tools that keep hard conversations from collapsing into old patterns. The goal isn't to settle whose childhood was harder. It's to build the first version of your relationship that the two of you actually chose.

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The Atlas Approach

Our approach combines research-backed methods that address both the childhood system you shared and the adult relationship you're building.

Each session is customized to your relationship, and may include:

  • Mapping the family roles and dynamics you each inherited — who carried what, who was protected from what — and how those assignments still script your conflicts today

  • Structured conversations about the flashpoints: caregiving for parents, money and inheritance, old hurts and unspoken resentments, and the different childhoods you each lived through

  • Practicing direct communication and repair in the room — saying the real thing without attack, hearing the other's story without surrendering your own, and building agreements you both can keep

You'll leave with both stories heard, the old roles loosened, and practical agreements for the decisions — and holidays — ahead.

Our work together draws on structural and systemic family therapy approaches alongside emotionally focused work — adapted to sibling relationships and to your family's culture.

Results after therapy

Many siblings complete this work within 8–15 sessions and report:

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The Old Roles, Retired

  • Conversations that stay in the present instead of collapsing into 1998

  • The golden child/scapegoat scorekeeping, finally set down

  • Each sibling's version of childhood acknowledged — without a verdict on whose was harder

The Present, Negotiated

  • Caregiving, money, and estate decisions made as partners, with clear agreements

  • Holidays and family events without the dread — or the annual blowup

  • Boundaries that let you show up for family without falling back into your role

A Relationship You Actually Chose

  • Connection that exists on its own — not just routed through your parents

  • Repair after decades of distance, or a working relationship where a warm one isn't possible yet

  • The longest relationship of your life, finally on terms you both set

Frequently Asked Questions

  • Yes — it's family therapy focused on the sibling relationship, and it's a growing area for good reason: sibling bonds are typically the longest relationships of our lives, they shape us profoundly, and yet they almost never receive direct attention. Most people work on their marriages and their parenting; the sibling relationship usually only gets help once it's in crisis. It doesn't have to wait that long.

  • Both, though most of our sibling work is with adults — siblings navigating parental caregiving, old resentments, rifts, or drift. For children and teens, sibling conflict is usually addressed within whole-family therapy, where parents are part of the solution.

  • Usually not — the point of sibling therapy is a space that belongs to the sibling relationship itself, not to the family hierarchy. That said, if the work reveals that certain conversations need the wider family, your therapist can help you decide whether a family session makes sense.

  • This is one of the most common — and most solvable — sibling impasses. Siblings genuinely do grow up in different families: different birth-order positions, different treatment, different years of their parents' marriage and finances. Therapy doesn't referee whose memory is correct; it makes room for both experiences to be real, which is usually what each of you has been waiting decades to hear.

  • The logistics may be legal or financial, but the fights rarely are — caregiving and inheritance conflicts run on older fuel: who was favored, who sacrificed, who owes what. Therapy addresses the layer underneath, which is what actually makes the practical agreements possible (and keeps them from unraveling).

  • If you're both willing to come, it's not too late — and even long estrangements can move once each side's story is truly heard. If your sibling isn't willing yet, you can begin individually: working on your side of the relationship, and on a possible invitation, often shifts things. Some rifts repair fully; others reach a workable peace. Both are real outcomes.

  • Yes, with care. Where there's a genuine harm — not just mutual friction — the work includes real accountability, not a false "both sides" split. A repaired sibling relationship can't be built on minimizing what happened; it gets built on what was acknowledged.

  • Sessions are confidential to the two of you. If your therapist meets with either sibling individually, clear agreements are set up front about what carries back into joint sessions — no ambushes, and no one holding secrets for the other.

  • Many siblings complete focused work within 8–15 sessions — often quicker than couples work, since the goals are frequently specific: repair a rift, negotiate caregiving, survive the holidays differently. Longer-standing estrangements or deep childhood wounds may take more time.

  • Either sibling can take the first step. Book a free consultation call — we'll listen to what's happening, help you think about how to invite your sibling if they're hesitant, and match you with the right therapist.

Meet our Therapists

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    Janine Cheng, LCSW

    Founder + Clinical Director

    Culturally responsive therapy for perfectionists, people-pleasers, stressed couples, and strained families. Structured, and goal-oriented in a warm and supportive setting.

    Full Bio
  • A woman with medium-length dark hair, wearing hoop earrings, a white turtleneck, and a light brown blazer, smiling in front of a plain white wall.

    Dr. Lisa Cordero, PsyD, LMHC, LPC

    Psychotherapist

    Active, goal-oriented therapy for individuals, couples, and families — insight into why you're stuck, and concrete tools to change it.

    Full Bio
  • Portrait of a woman with black hair smiling, wearing a light gray sweater, standing against a plain light-colored background.

    Donna Hahn, LMSW

    Associate Psychotherapist

    Therapy for first-generation adults, perfectionists, and high achievers who are ready to put down the mask, quiet the replaying mind, and hear their own voice again.

    Full Bio

  • Jennifer Aghavian, LMSW

    associate psychotherapist

    Attachment-focused therapy for individuals and couples navigating anxiety, self-doubt, and relationship difficulties. Understand how past experiences, family or cultural expectations shape the way you relate to yourself and others.

    full bio
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Experience personalized therapy at our office in Nomad

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Our office in Manhattan was intentionally designed to create a sense of comfort, privacy, and ease from the moment you walk through the door. Surrounded by refined interiors and a peaceful atmosphere, you'll find a space that encourages reflection, connection, and meaningful change.

All in-person sessions will take place in a warm, inviting space that will help you feel calm and centered for the work. The office is located in Nomad and easily accessible via the 1, 2, 3, N, R, W, B, D, F, M and 6 lines.

Connect With Us

Book a Consult

You can schedule an introductory conversation with our Clinical Director using the calendar below. During this conversation, we’ll learn more about what you’re looking for and help match you with the therapist on our team who best fits your needs.

If you prefer to connect directly with a therapist, explore our team bios and schedule a consultation with the therapist you’re most interested in working with.

E-mail Us

If you’re not quite ready to book a consultation, use the form below to introduce yourself and tell us a little about what you’re looking for.

You’ll hear from our Clinical Director within 24 business hours.

Based on what you share about your concerns, goals, preferences, availability and budget, we’ll recommend one or more therapists whose experience and approach may be a good fit and guide you through the next step.

Rewrite your story today.

You don't have to keep repeating the same patterns. Therapy can help you better understand what's driving them and create a different path forward. Let us help find the right therapist for you.

Request a free consultation